Did I get my fiance a sexist present?

When I first started dating The Man, I have to admit that I was a little off put when I went to his house and it seemed like everywhere I turned there was another “hot girl” in the form of scantily clad superheroines. I found the most offense with the DC Bombshell collection he had, not because those girls were the most provocative but because he had spent considerable amount of money on them; it was literal objectification of women.

So for Christmas this year I bought him the Catwoman Bombshell* to add to his collection.

Why on earth would I buy him one of these statues when a year ago I viewed them as instruments of misogyny?

1) I’m more secure in our relationship.

I fight against the idea that women have to fit a certain mold to be socially accepted as beautiful because it’s the right thing to do. I also fight against it because I am insecure that as an overweight woman, I do not fit that mold, and even if/when I lose the weight, I will still never look like these bombshells…no one will. So when I first saw them, my immediate thought was, “Is this what he wants me to look like? He knows that’s never going to happen. Is this his ideal woman?”

A year later, we are engaged and have an awesome and secure relationship. I know he loves me for who I am and my appearance is part of that.

2) He thinks I look like that.

Ok, not entirely (I mean, his vision is bad but it’s not THAT bad), but sometimes he tells me that a statue, picture, or character reminds him of me. I physically do not look like these women, AT ALL, and yet he still finds me attractive. And attractiveness and sexiness isn’t all about appearance. One thing that all these statues exhibit is a confidence in these characters, and confidence is always sexy regardless of physical appearance.


Are you seeing double?


I mean we’re practically twins!

3) He admires them.

These statues aren’t designed for men to ogle and jerk-off to; there’s plenty of free stuff on the internet for that. If you spend the kind of money to buy one of these figures, it’s because you genuinely appreciate the art that goes in to the crafting of the characters and the crafting of the statues themselves. The Man doesn’t say, “Look at the hot girls I’ve collected.” Instead he points out the details and explains why he loves the characters.

4) It makes him happy.

That’s what giving is about; making people happy!

Is sexism still an important issue especially in regards to comics? YES! Women are made into secondary characters and sexualized way more than men, and we need to continue to fight for respect and equality, but if I can admire Loki for his charisma and cunning (and looks), then he should be able to admire Catwoman for the same reason.

*This link is to Amazon, but I purchased the statue at our favorite local comic shop.  Support small businesses!