Why my dog isn’t invited to my wedding

I love my dog more than my fiancé.

This [totally true] joke has been made ever since we started dating. To say I’m obsessed with my dog might be a bit of an understatement. I definitely have more pictures of him on my phone than anyone/anything else. The only reason I have Snapchat is to send pictures of him to my sister. One year for my birthday, my family had a portrait of him commissioned (the cost was a donation to the local animal shelter…we’re not completely insane), and I had a bobble head of him made (ok, so maybe I am that insane). So it comes as a shock to most people that the dog is not invited to the wedding.


What do you mean I’m not invited?!


I definitely have a necktie for him, which he looks ADORABLE in, and I ogle the puppy ring bearer outfits at Petco. I’ve seen plenty of pictures and videos of dogs involved in weddings, and they are just precious and for a second I think that maybe he should come, but then I remember the 4 very valid reasons I have for not wanting him there:


1) He’s not allowed.

This one’s pretty straightforward. Our venue doesn’t allow dogs (other than service animals of course) in the building. We could’ve found a venue that did allow him, but we didn’t, so there. But even if our venue did allow dogs, I’ve still got other reasons.



How can you not let this face into your building?

2) I don’t want to worry about him on my big day.

My dog likes people. There will be a lot of people at my wedding. Not all people like dogs. My dog also likes to jump on people. Fancy dresses, bare legs, suits and a jumping dog don’t sound like a good mix. My dog also sheds his blonde hair all over dark clothes.

Of course he is also way more popular than either my fiancé or myself so plenty of friends have said that they would volunteer to be his wrangler for the evening. As much as I don’t want to be worrying about him, I don’t want my guests to worry about him. Everyone should be able to relax and have a good time. Also, I don’t want to be competing for attention with my dog on my wedding day!


He can get very energetic when he’s excited!


3) I don’t want him in my pictures.

This may sound weird coming from someone who has thousands of pictures of her dog, but let me explain. I take tons of pictures of him every day, and I enjoy them for a while, but then they end up in the digital collection of photos that I will look back on every once in a while, but not that often. Pictures from my wedding day are going to be the most important ones of my life. They will be framed, hung in prominent places, put into albums, and looked at frequently. So why wouldn’t I want my dog in those pictures?

As much as I pretend he is immortal, the fact is that in a decade, he’s not going to be with me anymore. I get overwhelmed and teary-eyed just thinking about the day he’s going to leave me. So in a decade or so, when I’m looking at my wedding photos, I don’t want my dog to be in those pictures because I don’t want my heart to break every time I look back on the happiest day of my life.


Our happy family!


4) I love my dog more than my fiancé.

Yes, it’s a joke, but it’s kind of true. I’ve known my dog longer than I’ve known my fiancé. I’ve lived with my dog longer than I’ve lived with my fiancé. I’ve shared a bed with my dog longer than I’ve shared a bed with my fiancé. I’ve taken more vacations with my dog than with my fiancé. And my dog definitely greets me with more enthusiasm when I get home.

My wedding day needs to be about me and my fiancé, NOT about me, my fiancé, and my dog. Most days I’ll give my dog more attention and affection than I give my man, but on our wedding day he deserves to be the center of my attention (even if it’s only for the one day). I don’t want the love I have for my dog to overshadow the love I have for my husband.


My two loves!


…As soon as we come back from the honeymoon, though, the dog goes back to number 1!


This was Boston sitting under my desk as I wrote this post (with his Superman toy)

Lea Salonga

Name: Lea Salonga

Lea and Kermit

I hope I look this good when I’m 44!  I also hope I get to meet Kermit the Frog!

Fictional: Nope!

Universe: Broadway and Disney

Bio: Lea Salonga became a Broadway star at age 18 when she starred in Miss Saigon in London and on Broadway. She won several awards for her performance, including the Tony award (and the first Asian American to do so). She also performed in both the 10th and 25th anniversary concerts of Les Miserables as Eponine and Fantine respectively. Most people outside of the theatre community probably know her best as the singing voice for both Princess Jasmine and Mulan, for which she was named a Disney Legend in 2011. She is currently starring on Broadway with George Takei and Telly Leung in Allegiance, which will run until February 14th.

Why I have a crush on her:

My two biggest nerd areas are Disney and theatre, and Lea Salonga satisfies both of these.

I’ve been in love with Lea Salonga’s voice for what seems like forever. As with most people, I first heard her when she sang A Whole New World in Aladdin. And then she also got to sing as Mulan. Classic Disney films and animations used to use the same actors for several movies, but the more modern Disney animated films very rarely use the same actor in two different movies, at least not for the lead characters, so I can only imagine how cool it must be to claim credit for TWO Disney Princesses! Growing up I wanted to be a voice over artist badly, and I really wanted to voice a Disney Princess.

And then there’s her theatre resume. She’s played both Eponine and Fantine in Les Miserables; two roles most people would kill to do and she’s done both (and I don’t think she murdered anyone to do them, but I can’t say for sure). She’s also played Grizabella in Cats and Cinderella in the Rogers and Hammerstein show in the Philippines. And of course she starred in Miss Saigon and Flower Drum Song on Broadway.

But here’s the thing I didn’t realize until I recently started following her on Facebook; Lea Salonga is a big ole’ nerd like the rest of us. She certainly has no issues speaking her mind, supporting women’s rights, minority’s rights, and artist’s rights. She also makes Star Wars references and pines over Tom Hiddleston! The more I read about her, the more I love her.

My gosh, #Metalocalypse still kicks major butt!!!

Posted by Lea Salonga on Friday, January 15, 2016

And Lea, if you’re reading this, I have a Mulan poster that Ming Na-Wen signed, and I’d love to add your autograph to it!

Perfect Together: Behind the Scenes

I’ve found that there are two types of people on social media; those who try to present their lives as better than they are, and people who try to present their lives as worse than they are. I think most people fall into the first category (although I may feel that way because I block people who fall into the second category). The point is that although I try not to be obnoxious about it, I certainly do fall into the first category. Life is going great for me right now, and I present it as such on social media, but it’s certainly not perfect. Take an interaction I had with my fiancé this afternoon:

We’ve been living together for several months now, but I still haven’t fully moved in because a friend is renting my house so there wasn’t a big rush for me to move my crap out. Last weekend we finally rented a truck and brought the furniture down. This weekend he stayed home and worked on clearing room in the common areas for my stuff while I went up to my old house to clean up and clear out the “little things” (odds and ends that hadn’t been boxed up yet, but filled up my car two times over).

Out entire house has been overrun with random boxes, bins, and bags of my stuff. There is literally no place to sit except for an office chair in my room and an office chair in his room, which means we have no place to just hang out together. This is what happens when you try and combine two fully furnished houses in to one. Needless to say, getting my room in order is a priority for me, and I’ve been a little stressed out about it.

So The Man, sees me being stressed out and, being the sweet guy that he is, thinks, “She’s super stressed out. I’ll help her by going to the grocery store, which is a chore I know she’s not particularly fond of.” So what he meant to say was, “I will go to the grocery store. Is there anything you need?”

But that’s not what he said. Instead he said, “Why don’t you sit down and make a list and then I’ll go to the grocery store?”

And this is how my sleep-deprived, exhausted, malnourished brain reacted: “Are you freaking kidding me?! He expects me to sit down and plan our meals for the week and make a shopping list? Does he realize how much effort goes in to that? I have spent the past two days loading and unloading my car and running up and down the stairs probably 100 times! There is crap all over our whole house that I have to get to fit in a small guest room while still making it look like a frickin Pinterest masterpiece, and he wants me to think about what food we’ll need this week?! When am I going to have time to cook? He’s going to have to do all the cooking this week because I’ll be spending it cleaning, and if he’s doing all the cooking then why doesn’t he make the list? I wonder what would happen if I hurled this screwdriver at his skull…”

So I snapped at him. I didn’t say everything that had gone through my head in that split-second, but I wasn’t particularly pleasant. Luckily he knows that I tend to be irrational when I’m stressed, and I am self-aware enough to know that as well, so I apologized pretty quickly. A few minutes later when he said he could get ingredients to make ice cream using the ice cream maker his mother got me for my birthday (Yes, I enjoy making ice cream, but you do know how much work goes into making it? It takes like half an hour to make the batter and then it has to chill for a couple hours, not to mention the amount of dishes that are used, and our kitchen is a mess right now so where am I going to do the prep work?  I’ve got lesson plans to write, an IEP to revise and the house looks like a tornado swept through!) I reacted slightly more rationally and told him that just buying ready-made ice cream would be better.

He came back with S’mores ice cream and a bag of my favorite sweet potato chips (which I have eaten the whole thing of while typing this). So in 140 characters on Twitter I might say “My guy got me S’mores ice cream and sweet potato chips! #bestfianceever!”, but just know that we’re still learning to live with each other, and it’s not perfect all the time. But we’re figuring it out!

Becky (1)

What makes it on social media…


What is really going on.

Resolution Updates: Week 1

First week of the New Year down, and here’s how I’m doing on my January resolutions:

  • Finances – organize and file receipts

I haven’t started a filing system yet, but I have saved my [important] receipts and put them in one place, so that’s a start. My plan is to sit down on Sunday and get my files set up.

  • Housekeeping – put laundry away as soon as it’s done

I was doing pretty well with this when I was doing laundry on the weekend, but then I did a couple loads during the week and they didn’t get finished until the morning and I didn’t have time to put them away before work. They are at least folded in the laundry basket, and they haven’t left the laundry room yet, so at least they haven’t created a pile in the bedroom. I’ll get to them as soon as I’m done typing this.

  • Health – get a primary car physician

Haven’t done this yet, but I was reminded yesterday that I need to. I actually went to get an MRI done (more on that later), and when I was doing the paperwork, the intake worker asked me about my primary care physician, and I proudly told her that it was my goal this month to get one!

  • Fitness – Don’t complain when it’s time to go to the gym

Going back to work and going back to the gym at the same time has made this difficult, but I’ve been ok with this. I have made a point to avoid complaining, although I did cut one of our workouts short, although in my defense we got there late and spent more time on the weights than we had expected, so by the time we were ready to do cardio, it was time for bed, and I do not mess around with bed time. There’s a workout group starting at work, too, so that will help. (Also, my little sister is doing super well with hitting the gym and losing inches, and I will NOT let her look better than me at my wedding!)

So after a week, I haven’t been perfect, but these goals are all about being attainable, and I can definitely complete these by the end of the month.


Name: Mulan


Who is that girl I see, staring straight back at me?

Fictional: Yes (possibly was a real person, but any truth is probably buried in legend at this point)

Universe: Chinese Legend/Disney

Bio: Mulan is a woman from a family with no sons (some stories say she had a brother but that he was very young). When the Chinese Army orders one man from every family to serve, Mulan saves her elderly father’s life by cross dressing and entering the Army in his place.

Why I have a crush on her:

From what I’ve read about the legend of Mulan, this may be the closest Disney has come to staying true to the original story…that has nothing to do with why I have a crush on her, it’s just interesting.

Mulan is the only Disney Princess who isn’t actually a princess. Seriously! All of the other women featured in the Disney Princess brand are royalty either by blood or marriage, but not Mulan. That’s not to say she didn’t EARN her seat at the cool kids’ table. She didn’t defeat one bad guy, she defeated THOUSANDS OF BAD GUYS! All Snow White did was bite an apple.

Mulan also showed strength (mental and physical), ingenuity, courage, and humility; remember when she was offered a job as the Emperor’s right-hand person and she turned it down because she wanted to go back to her family? She didn’t dress like a man, join the army, become the pack leader, start an avalanche that destroyed the 99% of the Hun army, and then storm the palace to defeat the main bad guy and save the emperor because she was ambitious. She did all those things because they were the right things to do (except dressing like a man, which was the only thing she could do in a misogynistic society).

And although she may have had a crush on Shang, and a romantic relationship was hinted at the end of the movie, the plot was not dependent on it, and Mulan was not dependent on him. So for everyone who says that Elsa is the first Disney heroine to not need a man, remember Mulan! (Also, Merida)

Resolutions: Baby Steps

The She-Hulk Diaries (the inspiration for the title of this blog) starts off with Jennifer Walters making her New Year’s Resolutions, except she decides to give herself some extra time and make Valentine’s Day Resolutions. I’m going to follow suit and do something slightly unconventional; I’m going to make monthly resolutions.

New Year’s Resolutions typically fail because people make them too large, and because they’re supposed to last all year, once you miss going to the gym once or have one debaucherous night you think, “Oh well, I screwed that up, I guess I’m going to have to wait until next January 1st to make myself a better person.” Instead of setting myself up for failure, I am going to set myself up for success by resolving to take baby steps to achieve my goals.

There are four areas I want to improve upon: finances, housekeeping, health, and fitness. Each month I will choose one aspect from these areas that I can work to improve, and we’ll see where I am at the end of the year. So here are my January Resolutions.


1) Finances – Organize and file receipts

I just bought a new car (yay!) and while cleaning out my old car, I found so many receipts that I had just thrown in there…seriously, there were SOOOOO many! I know I need to get a better handle on all of my receipts to track what I’m spending, where I’m spending it, and what I’m spending it on. Not to mention it will make tax time a lot easier.

2) Housekeeping – Put all laundry away as soon as it’s done

I don’t mind doing laundry, and I LOVE the way it feels and smells straight out of the dryer, but I HATE putting laundry away. It’s not like it takes particularly long to do or that it takes a lot of energy, I just don’t do it. Right now we have piles of clothes on the floor and I can’t tell which are clean and which are dirty, so I just end up rewashing everything (which isn’t good for the clothes, the environment, or my water bill). If I can spend a month putting the laundry away when it’s done, hopefully it will become a habit.

3) Health – Get a Primary Care Physician

This one will make my mother happy. Ever since I outgrew my pediatrician I haven’t had a primary car provider. I’ve always just gone to urgent care when I’ve gotten sick, but I know that I need to take better care of myself, especially since I’m almost 30 and looking to start a family soon. It’s time to start focusing on preventative care instead of just reactive care and getting a regular doctor is the first step.

4) Fitness – Don’t complain when it’s time to go to the gym

The Man and I have been pretty good about getting to the gym regularly, but most of my motivation comes from him dragging me there. Every time he says, “We’ve got to go workout.” I flop on the bed and throw a tantrum like a small child (and he still puts up with me!). I know going to the gym is necessary, and once I’m there I feel better about myself, but if I can have a better attitude about it before we go that would probably motivate me to go more often or go when he’s not there pushing me.


So those are my resolutions for January. Baby steps!